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Why can`t braille just be in the shape of the letters?
People say there are plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but I’m human, I don’t date fish.
What if animals all speak a universal language, and we’re the odd ones out???
Yes it may sound childish but if it glows in the dark I still get freaking exited.
This cashier looked at my 12 bottles of weed spray so weirdly, I suspect she`s never broken a lawnmower before.
Nascar would be so more entertaining if they threw banana peels and turtle shells.
I went to the doctor for a check up and he says I`m going to live. But I think he`s wrong and it`s just a matter of time.
I`m a crabby a$$ bitch before my coffee ... and after
My friends made fun of me for buying this flamethrower, but at least I don`t have to shovel snow this weekend.
Whew, good thing there`s a facebook petition for ending the shutdown, or else we`d be in real trouble.
Nothing makes me more nervous than getting FB msg saying, “You’ve been tagged in a photo” after a crazy weekend.
It’s people that give drinking a bad name.
Stop leaving me messages. If I ever wanted to talk to you again, I wouldn’t have borrowed all that money.
I feel sorry for people who take everything way too seriously.
Tarantulas are like cigarettes. They are pretty much harmless, until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire.