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I was laying down, looking up at the stars while I was writing this post. Then it dawned on me; `Where the heck is the ceiling?`
Beheaded our snowman to let winter know we mean business.
Step 1 - Change your Wi-Fi password to "blowmefirst." Step 2 - Wait for someone to ask you for it.
You bring everyone a lot of joy ... when you leave the room.
I dance like people wish they weren`t watching.
I`m a bad multitasker and even a questionable monotasker
"2 weeks with my baby xoxoxo" lol,calm down romeo&juliet.
You know you`re getting old when you fall down and wonder what else you can do while you`re down there.
Sharing your faith on Facebook is like sharing a fart in a elevator. It might feel nice to come out but no one really wants to hear it.
If anyone is looking for an unlicensed helicopter pilot give me a call. . .
I don`t always say I`m never drinking again, but when I do, I`m a f*cking liar.
My participation in this meeting will be based solely on the snacks they provide.
Sometimes, even I`m afraid of the things my mind comes up with.
Best part of living alone...clothing optional ;)
One man’s LOL is another man’s WTF.