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scream outloud and really fast "I won a math debate"
The good thing about Facebook is if someone gets on your nerves enough, you can make them cease to exist in your world and you don`t even have to hide a body.
I prefer to use the bathroom naked w/ the door wide open. Sorry if this interferes with your idea of a "safe & fun work environment"
Things that schools worry about Drugs 1% Graduating 1% drop outs 1% the inportance of using a number 2 pencil on standardized tests 97%
Offering someone food and secretly hoping they say no.
Weekends are like a orgasm.. It`s takes a lot to get there and when u finally do it`s over in no time
Gym update: not there
How to meet a girl: 1) Walk into a bar. 2) Shout “Heroes in a half shell.” 3) When a girl yells back “Turtle Power,” marry her.
There`s no way to look cool when the doctor walks into your exam room just as you`re blowing up a rubber glove.
I was called a sexist today ... I said, I think you`re mistaken ...its pronounced sexy
I`m not antisocial. I`m pro leave-me-the-hell-alone.
Why do we even ask rhetorical questions?
Whoever said "What goes around, comes around", never passed around a bag of Doritos......................
The Best Excuse given by a Lady for Missing Work ! "My husband took an overdose of Viagra.....Couldn`t leave him alone with the Maid"
BOOK FACT: If you took every book at Barnes and Noble and laid them end to end you get thrown out by security and banned from returning.