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Just when you think you have the answer a woman will be there to change the question.
I inject vodka right into the orange. Screwdriver-to-go
My wife said I can definitely have a man cave, if that`s what I want to start calling the hall closet.
I`ve never been skydiving, but I`ve zoomed in on Google Earth really, really fast.
I hate how my friends are always trying to convince me to do extreme activities. Like bungee jumping, skydiving or leaving the house.
Relationship status: sleeping in my bed diagonally.
I finally found a simple and easy way to deal with my weight problem. I threw my scale out.
Roses are red and sometimes they`re thorny, when I think of you, I get really ...............
Time to get Star Spangled hammered. Happy 4th you crazy Americans.
Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn’t doing his part of the chores around here.
This post was going to be really funny but I didn`t write it down because I was totally sure I`d remember it.
I`ll never fall in love untill and unless love falls on me!
My therapist told me I`m nuts. I said "I wanted a second opinion." She said "Well ok, you`re ugly too."
If you have to tell us that you`ve been going to the gym, you probably need to go more often....
Ever wish the choice you made and the “right thing to do” were the same thing?