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They say love is more important than money. I`d like to see them go and try to pay their bills with a hug.
I learned how to kiss passionately by practicing on my hand, but now it just uses me for sex.
Lil Wayne is 10% African-American and 90% tattoo.
Marriage. Because otherwise hating someone for turning the page of a newspaper too loudly would seem absurd
Kids are like debit cards. I get yelled at when I accidentally leave them at the store.
If a man repeats everything a woman says, word for word,,,,,,,, is he still wrong?
I`m placing myself in "time-out" until I`m able to play nice with others! This may take a few hours as there are stupid people everywhere!
I am not as think as you drunk I am
I`ve found the most effective way to get an attractive guy to fall for me is by simply using my charm... and then a stun gun.
You being crazy doesn`t bother me. It`s you being crazier than me...That makes me freakin` jealous.
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. -Me with beer, me without beer
Well the Christmas tree is out of the house, and back on the rear view mirror.
If i had a dollar for everytime i was thinking about you, i would start thinking about you.
I should be ashamed of myself. Lets be clear, I`m not. But I should be.
Neil Armstrong was the first human being to step foot on the moon. Neil A. backwards spells "Alien"