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I have decided to stop doing things "Like a Boss" and will now do things "Like a Rhinestone Cowboy."
Is it called NASCAR because that’s the way a hillbilly pronounces “nice car?”
Click Like, if you hate being told what to do.
It`s only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you realize that there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.
Sorry I wasn’t ignoring you I was just watching 7 seasons and 54 episodes of this new show I found.
The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
if the shoe fits wear it , if it too tight take it off
Soup of the day: Beer
You can`t fix stupid, but you can always drink more beer.
I`m getting worried about this Ebola virus. I mean, I`ve got Norton but...
Always bring a stopwatch to church, guys. You want the girl that spends the longest amount of time in confession.
Two clowns are eating a cannibal. One turns to the other and says "I think we got this joke wrong."
I was about to do something awesome, again, but I told myself “Enough is enough, that’s plenty of awesome for one day”
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*
I guess I`m somewhat of a big deal, when I tell people about my accomplishments, they always say, "Big deal."