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That amazing moment when you find money in your clothes that you forgot was there.
Smile at the people who hate you. It makes them wonder what you`re up to. :)
If you didn`t hear it with your own ears or see it with you own eyes. Don`t invent it with your small mind, and share it with your big mouth.
I love the people in parking lots with "free kittens" signs because I too feel that kittens shouldn`t be oppressed.
Lets not get carried away it`s not like McDonalds shutdown
Send a man to the store to get 5 items, he will come home with 4. Send a woman to the store to get 5 items she will come home with 54. Its science.
Singing in the shower is illegal according to this Ikea security guard.
These Days everything is really starting to Click!.......My knee`s, my elbows, and the rest of my joints!
Just found my TV remote and a newspaper in my fridge. It`s pretty awesome that society lets me live by myself.
Why Couldn`t Snoop Dogg & Dr.Dre Get On The Bus ... Because They Forgot 50 Cent
It`d be nice if the married people would leave some of the single people for the rest of the single people.
When I say I can cook, I mean I can melt cheese on stuff.
I`ve done it in the bathroom, I`ve done it in the bedroom, I`ve done it in the kitchen, on the couch, outside, in the bus, yoo I just can`t seem to stop this texting.:)
"We have HBO" - apparently still a bragging point in the motel industry.
I saw a guy walking 4 dogs this morning and thought, Wow!.. That guy must be really blind.