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Pick any number. Multiply it by two. Now add 12 to it. Divide it by 3. Now change it to 10. That`s how many seconds you just wasted.
Girls are like guitars: easy to strum, hard to tune
Yoga pants are just push up bras for your butt.
I ignored your Facebook friend request because there isn`t a "Hell no!" button.
If Apple really want to introduce something new and "innovative" they should just release a longer charger.
Is there a 5-second Rule for when you drop babies? ...Asking for a friend. JK people!!! LOL ;)
Even though I`m a guy I still get nervous when I pee on a pregnancy test.
It`s time to wave goodbye to winter. Guess what finger I`ll be using?
My favorite form of lying to myself is choosing a deodorant scent that contains the words `active` or `sport` in it`s name
How do we know that all the ancient Greek sculptures aren`t just victims of Medusa?
I put the hot in psychotic.
Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that I´m typing this with my middle finger.
Never ask a Leper to "give you a hand", seriously, don`t........................
"Love your friends, Not their sisters." & "Love your sisters, Not their friends." -By Mummy...
I look forward to paying off all my debt so I can get back to just being broke