Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m not bothered if someone likes me or Not. Even Angels are hated by Demons.
I feel like dinner parties are secretly competitions about who watches the most news and documentaries
Everyone is gifted......But not everyone opens their present
about love
If its the thought that counts, then I`ve banged so many hot chicks.
If I could time travel, I`d make sure the guy who made up the word Walkie-Talkie got to name more things.
Women`s logic: I went to buy a suit. But i saw a beautiful pair of shoes. So i bought this handbag.
Paused Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory to go buy a Snickers. This is why I can`t watch Breaking Bad.
I`m not lazy, I just rest before I get tired
Women who say the quickest way to a man`s heart is through his stomach, have not seen his browser history.
I like going into McDonald`s and ordering an Egg McMuffin and a McChicken, just to see which one comes first.
So I met an Egyptian ... they walk just like us.
Good friends do not let you do stupid things….. alone :)
Most hated song in jail: "Bad Boys, Bad Boys, whatcha gonna do when they come for you"......
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap a better status than yours!