Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Never judge a man ’till you’ve driven a mile with his wife.
When people with multiple personality disorders are about to die, whose life flashes before their eyes?
My parents would hide fruit roll ups on top of the refrigerator, where I couldn`t reach them. Then leave chemicals right under the sink.
when is humpty dumpty going to hatch?
"My name is Robert and I support apples." -- Bob for apples
I chose the wrong fork in the road, took the road less travelled and got off the beaten path and now I don`t know where the hell I am.
The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.
Dear IRS…I would like an itemized receipt showing me exactly how every one of my tax dollars is being spent. Thanks.
Alcohol doesn`t make you fat, it makes you lean..........against tables, chairs, walls, and garbage cans.
Why isn’t the default for online shopping “view all”? Who likes to skip through 20 pages of only 12 items…
The Three Up`s in life: 1. Show 2. Keep 3. Shut
You know you are getting old when a bunch of annoying teenagers get murdered in a horror movie and you relate more with the killer.
I wonder if monsters ever get scared that we might be hiding under their bed?
I don’t let my friends do stupid things… ALONE!
Those 5 donuts I ate are really going to give me an extra boost during my workout today.