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My internet addiction is getting alt of ctl.
Weird when someone vanishes from your Facebook feed for 3 years then suddenly reemerges with the results of a "Which Muppet Are You?" quiz.
Just checked my Farmville for the first time in 2 years... It`s now a Walmart.
If cats had wings, they would still just lay there.
Every parent’s superpower is the ability to communicate “I love you!” and “I will kill you!” with a single look.
You’re not an easy person to like….I like that about you.
This job fair sucks... They don`t have one F*cking ride...
Admitting you have a problem is half the battle. Convincing everyone else that they`re the problem is the other half.
you know you`ve been facebooking too much when you accidentally say "LOL", in person...
I need to get out of bed and do something so I can justify taking a nap later.
Where did all the people walking around with boomboxes in the 80s go? I`m concerned
Save some time and just put your Taco Bell directly in the toilet.
Pretty sure airport food was priced by children just learning about numbers. "Ok Brian, how much should this apple cost?" SIXTY TWO DOLLARS!!
The early bird gets the worm. But the second mouse gets the cheese.
Just killed a cricket at work, and, long story short, I`m now being asked to audition for Riverdance.