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The best nicknames are the ones people don`t know they have.
Turns out that my get rich painfully slow scheme isn`t working out either.
Facebook: Saving us money on birthday cards since 2004
There´s a thin line between "I should do a status update about that" and "I should talk to a therapist about that"
Do you suppose prison guards could use `PROACTIV` to prevent outbreaks?
So you constantly feel sorry for yourself and feel the need to tell everyone all about it. I can’t imagine why he left you.
If you think human beings have evolved a lot. Look at how much Egyptians worshiped cats. Then go look at Facebook for about 10 minutes.
Is it so much to ask that everyone who ever wronged me be forced to leave the country and change their identity?
I found the "one" today! Surprisingly, It`s been on my keyboard all the time.
My credit score is just a picture of me crying in the front yard of a nice house.
I`m ready to regret having sex with you.
Wear black: all the non-conformists are doing it.
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous. I see a lot of new faces in the room this week and I`m very disappointed with all of you.
Gently placing your finger on someone’s lips and saying, “Shh, not another word,” is super romantic but cops don’t seem to think so.