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I BRIEFLY had an urge to clean ... but that lasted only 5 minutes .. whew! That was close! Lol
If your man is reluctant to talk about his feelings, it’s probably because you haven’t told him what they are yet.
To all my friends who post Controversial, Obscene, Dirty, Offensive, and Derogatory posts, .. Keep that sh!t up. I like it....
It takes balls to be a man.
I`ve been running as fast as I can, but I still can`t catch my breath.
Did anyone else ever wonder why the Easter Bunny gave away chocolate eggs? Last I checked, bunnies don’t lay eggs. What kind of sick new species is this?
If video games have taught me anything, it`s that you`ll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss.
They say that you are what we eat. This means that I am cheap, easy and ready in 2 minutes!
Blue&Black or White&Gold? Who cares what color the dress is, so long as its balled up on the floor of my bedroom.
I guarantee there`s a pregnant teenager somewhere who thinks `Ebola` would be a lovely name for their child.
I always wrap someone`s fist bump with my high five because paper beats rock.
I`d like to read an obituary that says "He laid down the boogie and played that funky music till he died."
I`d rather run a marathon than listen to someone talk about running a marathon.
Nobody pissed me off today... I got to get out more.
Just tore the tag off my mattress and there’s nothing the feds can do about it. MUAHAHAHAHA!!!