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I hate it when people beg for likes, like if you agree?
No matter how old you are ... swingsets are cool.
I like to walk through the mall and hand out bags of Cheetos to all the kids I see wearing white clothes
Mad respect to people who can stop eating when they`re full.
If any of you ever want your kitchen painted orange just give a six year old Cheetos for lunch and tell them not to make a mess. Works every time.
I get more excited seeing my luggage on a baggage carousel than I do seeing a person I know.
I wonder what Facebook employees do at work to waste time.
I always walk through my office with a stern look on my face and a toilet plunger to avoid conversations.
When plastic bags become currency, I will be king.
Don`t you just a hate it when you stumble into bed drunk only to be nagged by someone screaming "Get out" or "You live next door!"
You might be a REDNECK if you think S.T.O.P. means spin tires on pavement!! :)) lol
May your life be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.
I`ll see your fun outdoor activity and raise you a nap.
I`m sorry, we can`t hire you. But your background check was hilarious.
I hate it when people upload song lyrics as their status`s it reminds me of somebody i used to know