Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I thought Row vs. Wade was Washington`s decision when he reached the Delaware.
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OH NO !,,,,,,,,, I just realized I can`t stop calling the addiction hotline....
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Singing passionately in the shower: Pretty good idea. Dancing passionately in the shower: Not so much.
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Can`t wait `til I`m old enough to pretend I can`t hear.
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I wonder if one day somebody will knock on my door and say to me, “Hey ,we have 7 mutual friends in Facebook; may I come in?"
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My tricks aren`t for kids.
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i don`t care if u don`t like me ........... i am not a facebook status:D
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In my porno they`d deliver the pizza after they had sex because otherwise it`d just get cold.
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The funniest thing about this Facebook status is by the time you realize it doesn`t say anything important, it`s to late for you to stop reading it ... sucker
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How about first you show me your benefits and THEN I`ll let you know if we can be friends.
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My mother is the strongest woman I know. You should see how far she could throw a shoe.
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Get off your high horse. Seriously, it’s not safe to ride any animal that’s stoned.
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You`re single? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. Yea me too.
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There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
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Posting a status update before responding to someone`s text is the easiest way to let them know how unimportant they are.
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