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My dad taught me righty tighty, lefty loosie.... that`s why I never dated left handed chicks.
Not sure how coffee got its own table in the living room, but kudos.
You notice how no faith-healers have stepped forward to help out with the ebola crisis in Africa......
I wonder if any Disney managers ever start a meeting off with "What kind of Mickey Mouse operation are we running around here?"
"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, & nothing but the truth" ... I choose dare, your honor
I havend`t heard from DAEMON MAILER in years, I hope he`s okay.
Too bored to do nothing. Too lazy to do anything.
I hate it when my cat leaves a dead Smart Car on my doorstep.
Heat makes things expand. So I don`t have a weight problem...I`m just HOT.
I got food poisoning today. I don’t know when I’ll use it though.
I`m laying on my yoga mat making up fake poses to fit my current activity level. Right now I`m in "downward facing chalk outline".
I dropped my affordable health care because I couldn`t afford it .
The Ex is bringing my kids back home. Time to strategically place the panties I bought from Victoria`s secret around the house.
Played Naked Twister last night and man, did it get RAUNCHY!....I can`t imagine what it would be like with other people.
My neighbor put the box his fridge came in on the curb for trash pickup. Guess who has a new fort!