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I smile when I`m having dirty thoughts :)
Does lying face down on this carpet make me look unsociable?
It`s like nobody ever considers the consequences of getting to know me.
I am so confused. My boss just said "keep up the good work" and I have no recollection of doing any such work.
I`m not bothered if someone likes me or Not. Even Angels are hated by Demons.
Adding "just sayin" to a smart-a$$ed comment makes you even more of an a$$hole. Just sayin
I hate it when teachers say, “You think it’s funny?” Obviously it is, if it wasn’t I wouldn’t be laughing
Do you know what this house is missing? A box of $#!+, Let`s get a cat.
Conspiracy theorists are all so dumb that I suspect they`ve been planted by a secret organization to distract us from what`s really going on
I am upping my standards.. so up yours!
Serving size ?? LMAO
My status would be a lot funnier if you could see my back-up dancers.
Bacon is the only exception that does not fall under the 5 second rule for dropped food.
Turns out a crash diet doesn`t mean having vodka with every meal and falling down the stairs at noon!
What do women want? The opposite of whatever they have.