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I don’t think it’s a coincidence that morning and mourning sound the same.
umm umm u know that school where i got the degree from
3 things I will never understand: 1. The meaning of life. 2. The universe. 3. How Spongebob & Patrick made those sounds effects in that box.
I just leased a 2013 lamborghini, no payments till January. Those f@kin Mayans better be right.
Social media - keeping people away from each other since 2006.
That awkward moment when you have 10+ tabs open and you can`t figure out which one the music is coming from.
It`s unfortunate that most people will never run out of things to say.
I`ve always pictured myself taking selfies.
If kindness really kills, you`ll always be completely safe around me.
Mo’ money, mo’ problems. This explains why I don’t have problems.
The older I get, the more I enjoy being bored.
Due to Global Warming Santa will be giving out Solar Panels to all the naughty kids this year!
Well the Christmas tree is out of the house, and back on the rear view mirror.
Apparently, "Giant ones" is not the appropriate response to the question, "What are the steps you would take in the event of an emergency?"
Notice how writers don’t rewrite books, how about we stop remaking movies.