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Business Plan: 1. Hold sign that says "Free Hugs" 2. Whisper during the hug, "it`s $50 to let go"
How can we call ourselves "evolved" when signs are needed to remind people to wash their hands after they go to the bathroom
I love you all so much right now because, well, alcohol.
The earth moves 1.6 million miles per day. So no I didn`t just "lay in bed and watch TV all day" I traveled very far thank u
"Everybody freeze!" -December
Raising teenagers is easy, they sleep 16 hours day, eat the other 8, and the only word in their vocab is "ok"
I`ve been working on losing weight, I was doing Jenny Craig for awhile........till her husband found out (<>..<>)
Why is it that people who can eat really spicy food think the rest of us give a sh!t?
Its awkward touching hands with another man in a popcorn bag, especially if you don`t know the man & he doesn`t know you`re eating his popcorn
I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my mind and my temper
If lemons hand you life, you’re probably dyslexic
Black, white, gay, straight, Christian, Jewish... It doesn`t matter. It`s all good. But a Pepsi drinker...
Well, Thanks to SAMSUNG, flat screens are no longer `Flat`.
If your cat has a Facebook page, we can`t be friends.
Just saw the previews for the movie Taken 3, you would think by now he would`ve gave his daughter self-defense and gun lessons?