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What if Egyptians actually had a written language, then started using emojis, and that’s all that’s left?
Sorry that offended you, I really didn’t think you’d get it.
So, when is this Old Enough To Know Better thing supposed to kick in?
FACT: Candy corn is made out of melted down traffic cones.
I`m not insulting you, I`m describing you.
Caterpillars have the ideal life. They eat a lot and then sleep for a while and wake up beautiful.
Raising teenagers is easy, they sleep 16 hours day, eat the other 8, and the only word in their vocab is "ok"
When buying a flat screen tv, always remember to put the box in your neighbor`s trash so you don`t get robbed.
Engineers: "okay, so we agree the space between the seat and the console will allow people to see what they dropped but never retrieve it"
Some things make you go hmm. Some things make you go ugh! I make you go "Did he really just say that?"
Applebees is a word that starts off pretty tame but takes a dangerous twist
I should be asleep, but there are a lot of things I should be.
Whenever I hear about a man jumping off a bridge I can`t help but wonder how long he was dating my ex.
You`d think by episode 133 the Scooby Doo gang would know it`s a guy in a costume every time.
Immature: A word boring people use to describe fun people.