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It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
April 1st is the absolute worst day to have a heart attack.
Live today like it`s your last!! But pay your bills and use a condom just in case it isn`t.
18 is TOO young to get married! You can`t even buy booze at 18! If you can`t buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?
If I throw a stick will you leave?
What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ”K” instead of ”OK”?
Hey Ladies..Prince charming is Gay and living with Mr. Right
To this day, the boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money. On the plus side, he makes a great Subway sandwich.
Can we all just agree to start spelling it "Wensday"?
"2 weeks with my baby xoxoxo" lol,calm down romeo&juliet.
he who laughs last thinks slow
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means I dropped them on the way from the dryer.
First thing I do in the morning: Look at the clock and hope I have more time to sleep.
Oh, you fell in love?! I fell in my bathtub.
If Welch’s is 100% Grape Juice, then why the heck do you list 4 other ingredients?