Daily Silly Status

I love work; it fascinates me. I can sit and watch folks do it for hours.

I`m going to be very disappointed if I go to England and nobody skips to the loo.

Sometimes I wish I could appear offline in real life too

Job interview: Please tell us why you’d love to work for us? ME: I need money :)

Therapy helps ... but screaming obscenities is faster and cheaper!

Do the spectators at golf tournaments know they don`t have to be there

That awkward moment when the mosquito is more interested in persistently banging it`s head against the windshield of your vehicle in an attempt to escape your presence than it is in trying to bite you. #feelingunattractive

Well I didn`t know that minding my own business becomes part of your business to mind

If your friends can accurately guess your age, you need to find dumber friends.

If you enter a room and there`s no food, you`re in the wrong room.

I`ve got a Tootsie Pop and seven hours until the aviary notices their Spotted Owl is missing. Let`s do this!

my stomach just growled and it sounded like it said... `Droid`....

I wish "You idiot" was an appropriate way to end a work email.

I procrastinate so much I’ll probably put off death and never die.

Nothing says " My divorce didn`t go as planned " quite like the guy with grocery bags hanging on the sides of his bicycles handlebars