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scream outloud and really fast "I won a math debate"
Better pound all these beers so I can get the bottles in the bin for recycling day.
I used to be a camera man in the porn industry but it became too hard...
You can really scare someone when you yell "Peek-a-boo!". Especially when they`re trying on clothes in the fitting room.
Tomorrow the world shall be ours! Until then, good night my evil minions!!
This headache feels like dumb people
I act like Pacman at parties. I walk around the room eating everything in site and avoiding everyone.
My mother is the strongest woman I know. You should see how far she could throw a shoe.
sex is like a joke, some get it some don`t.....
North West: Daddy what were you famous for? Kanye: rapping. North West: Mommy what were you famous for? ((awkward silence))
More people would call the Gambling Addicts Helpline if they made every 5th caller a winner.
If he pauses a video game to text you, he`s probably already losing, no need to feel special or anything,
Just once I would like to see a liars pants actually catch on fire
When I count calories it involves a bunch of multiplication.
hell yeah !!!! i was the lucky sperm !!!!!