Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Every year new words are added onto the dictionary, yet no new positions are added to the karma sutra.
If you never jumped from couch to couch as kid to avoid the lava, then you missed out on childhood.
That son of a b*tch moment when you`re walking around the house with socks on and step on a random wet spot.
If everything goes as planned, tonight I shall drink myself beautiful.
Never let a medical procedure scare you. That`s what the bill is for.
I went to open a can of Whoop-Ass but it had a child-proof lid.
When I said I missed you, I meant with a hammer.
Patience is what parents have when there are witnesses.
I`m a lover, not a fighter. So if anyone is giving you trouble and you need me to have sex with them, I`m your man.
The worst part about being single is always doing what I want. Anytime. Anywhere. With whomever. That sucks.
It`s such a beautiful day I had to open the window while I watched TV
An important phone call is something that occurs when there`s no better excuse to ignore someone.
Illiterate? Well then sign up today for free online reading classes!
Well, well, well. Guess who the grocery store asked to come back soon.
funny status idea: a funny and popular one