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Just so you know, the movie "Life of Pi" has nothing to do with dessert.
I hate when its dark and my brain is like “Hey you know what we haven’t thought of in a while?” Monsters.
I really have important work to get done, but I really just want to sit here and complete a quiz on what percentage redneck I am..
Comcast is doing home security now so if your house is being robbed they will get the police there on Tuesday between the hours of 8 & 12.
My local hairdresser just got arrested for selling drugs. Unbelievable! I`ve been her customer for 10 years and had no clue she was a hairdresser!
When I`m bored I like to call in sick to places I don`t work for. I`m getting written up at Home Depot
It`s a beautiful day. I think I`ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit
I was like "No, Pepsi is NOT ok. I wanted a Coke." And she was all "Sir, 911 should only be dialed for real emergencies."
My dream job is a pharmacy cashier & yelling for a price check every time someone checks out anal ointment, condoms, & men buying maxi pads.
Any amusement you may have experienced from my past posts are in no way a guarantee of future performance.... Please initial here and sign here.
that strange moment when you get in the van and theres no candy...-Drew Balthaser
Ebay is really getting worse and worse to use. Yesterday I searched for a cigarette lighter. I got 3,974, 601 matches...
If goldfish crackers actually tasted like goldfish-- wait, I just realized I`ve never tasted a goldfish. What if the crackers are accurate?
Twerking is the crocs of dancing.
Well, if you`re going to question my reputation and credentials as a gynecologist,I suggest you get the hell out of my office van.