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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

To be truthful,,, I have never unrolled a sleeping bag and been able to roll it back up any smaller than the size of a garage.
There is nothing louder than a party across the street that you weren’t invited to.
My hair only looks good on days when no one important sees it.
Sometimes I feel bad about the things I say and do, but today is not one of those days.
Tomorrow I will live in the moment, unless it`s unpleasant, in which case I will eat a cookie.
I don`t have any "driving the speed limit" music.
Those Box Tops that raise money for schools really should be on wine labels and cases of beer.
It`s only a 4 way stop if each driver can read
Why do people post pictures of missing people on facebook?...like we are going outside.
It`s just adorable how the Liquor Store cashier always wishes me a good week as if I won`t be back tomorrow.
If I drop my food on a plane, and we change time zones at the same time, do I receive an additional hour to the 5 second rule?
I really want to talk to you about how I don`t want to talk to you.
I just went into an AOL chat room to ask someone how to start a fire with sticks.
I have a lot on my plate right now. Not busy, just hungry.
I`m so poor I went to the ducks today to beg for bread...