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Got my friend a Starbucks gift card. 2 weeks later I get a call. They said hey Dean, u put any money on this Starbucks gift card. I said no it´s a gift card. That´s the beauty of it u can put as much money on it as u want.
Before you decide to spend less time on social media... make sure you go to every social media website and tell everyone.
I’m having some vision trouble today. I can’t see myself doing anything.
Call me lazy, but if it takes two clicks I’m not reading it.
I should probably be in a relationship just for the supervision.
I would leave my house a LOT more if I could take the couch with me and wear my pajamas.
Here`s a list of the things I have to look forward to today: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Drinking after work
Cool thing about winter is after grocery shopping your car can double as your refrigerator.
Alarm clocks should come with sounds like “tiny doll feet scampering into the closet” because I am not hitting snooze when I hear that
Really close to my perfect target weight. All I need now is one more stomach flu
My business card is just a picture of me looking inside the fridge.
I just saw a 3D printer at the UPS store. It`s kind of cool, but I won`t be impressed until it can print snacks...
I was trying to think of something really deep to post on Facebook this morning. The Mariana Trench comes to mind.
My therapist goes to her therapist five minutes after I leave.
:): The Bipolar smiley face