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No matter how busy a guy is, he can always take out a moment from his busy life to just stop and stare at a beautiful girl.
I`m not a psychologist,,, but I remember when a Hot Wheels track magically cured 80% of ADHD
2 words, 1 finger.
If you check Page 4, Paragraph 16, Subsection (d), right after the section on Video Game usage, but before the Book Report Procrastination provision and the No Face Piercings, Ever Amendment , you will that see that I am, in fact, and I quote: "the boss of you."
Truth is, it’s not a “long story”… I’m just too damn lazy to explain it.
is having one of those days where they feels like lighting someones face on fire and then trying to put it out with a fork
Of course I can keep a secret. It’s the people I tell it to who can’t.
When I see a cute couple making out I yell, ” I knew you’re seeing somebody else!” and run crying.
Over the weekend I pulled a muscle getting off the couch to fetch more Doritos.
If you feel bad because you didn’t do well on a final, just remember someone from your hometown is still trying to become a rapper.
Buying someone flowers is kind of a weird idea. Like: Hey, these are for you, now watch them slowly die, because I love you.
The easiest way for me to lose inches is to switch to the metric system.
Taxes are like a subscription to your country that you can`t cancel, no matter how bad the service gets.
Any of you had a friend that borrowed your sh!t and kept it for so long you had to borrow it back..
It`s time to admit that as a species, we are just not ready for 4-way stops