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Why are you showing me pictures of your kid if you have a dog?
I shouldn`t play with Legos!? It says "Ages 7 & Up". 30 is higher than 7. Instead of calling me immature, you need to go take a math class.
My brain is giving me the silent treatment today.
I tried yoga once, but we called it Twister
I tried stuff once. It was horrible.
*Gets absolutely nothing done*… Welp time for a break.
If you`re going to be stupid, don`t do it on Facebook.
Personality is 40% genetics, 40% upbringing, and 20% the last movie you watched.
If watching the big-screen TV with your pants off and a bag of Doritos is wrong, then they shouldn’t have couches at this Best Buy
If adult diapers are called Depends, then baby diapers should be called Definitely!!
God knew that there would be times that a single middle finger wouldn`t be enough.
Been reading up on the thesaurus lately because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage.
I`m not ignoring your calls, I just love my ringtone.
My local news station says it gives us " news when it breaks " ...I want unbroken news!!
A sure cure for sea-sickness is to sit under a tree.