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Got caught up in a really good book last night. I didn`t stop coloring till 2 o`clock this morning.
If you raise your children, you spoil your grandkids. If you spoil your children, you raise your grandkids.
More often than not, the excitement of a Facebook friend request dies upon discovering who it is.
My idea of heaven consists of all of the things I`d go to hell for.
According to the U.S. Census Bureau: 190,374 people are having sex right now, 212,130 are kissing, and 1 poor person is reading this post. You hang in there!
The only real difference between my 20s and my 30s is that now I make all my bad decisions before midnight.
I don’t understand why I cant lose weight. I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
Cake and pie can’t compete. If you put candles in a cake it’s birthday cake. Put candles in a pie and someone’s drunk in the kitchen.
My walk of shame is going back for a shopping cart after realizing I can`t carry 23 items in my arms through the store.
Girl Scout cookie season is scientifically timed to occur just as people are giving up on their New Year`s resolutions.
I wish I can start a new diet, but there`s a bunch of old diets I haven`t finish.
May you have a prosperous New Year. I may need to borrow money.
Women my age expect a man to have his sh!t together by now. Time to start dating younger women.
Single Awareness Day ..... it`s a S.A.D. day
Kinda funny how the Mayans said we were all gonna die in 2012, but they all disappeared way before us.