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I`m trying to live healthier......but I`m considering taking up cigars, since they`re still the coolest way to light dynamite fuses.
Just deserts: When a cashier hands you dollar bills back as change. Hold them up to the light like they do when you pay them.
My last post deserves WAY more likes than that....let`s go people....chop chop!
If I ever only have 3 months to live, I want my ex wife to be with me. That would be the longest 3 months of my life.
We have GPS that can navigate you across the country. Why can`t someone invent a device that can remind you why you went into a room?
Everyone always talks about the early bird. How about the early worm? How´d that work out for him?
??q? uo p??oq??? ? ?nq i ??i? ?s?? ??? si si??
If spiders ever come to the realization that people are terrified of them, we`re f*cked.
Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
Pumpkin for sale! [slightly used]
My wife told me I have to quit playing poker all the time but I think she`s bluffing...
My doctor recommended I increase the amount of Greens in my diet...so I started drinking more Rolling Rock.
Question everything...Or should you?
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A great friend will be handcuffed next to you saying that was fun
Dear whoever ate my fries while i was in the ball pit at McDonald`s... grow up!!