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Was sitting and doing nothing. Then I realized I could be sitting and doing nothing on Facebook. So here I am.
Women are always complaining that men are messy by leaving clothes layin around…..That’s because women take up all the closets
Scott Baio is not a part of the Presidential transition team. I’m really disappointed that Charles is not in Charge of anything.
Sorry to all my friends and family members who didn`t know I was a freak until they saw my likes and shares on Facebook.
When one door closes, another one opens.... That`s when you realize that you`ve bought a really bad second hand car.
I just ate what I thought was a feta cheese crumble from my salad off my shirt. Turns out it was deodorant. So how`s your day going?
would a fly without wings be called a walk?
The average man thinks about sex every tits seconds
Objects in spandex are larger than they appear
Free middle fingers for everyone!!!
Anything you say will be used against you, in an argument, 10 months from now, because I’m a woman. And we never forget. Anything. Ever.
I just slammed hard on the brakes and found 3 lighters, $4.67 in change, condom box, empty flask, half an 1/8th, and a puppy.
Some people are grateful for the impact you made in their life…. It’s not me, I think you’re a pr!ck.
They say you need to listen to what your body is telling you. But mine just points and laughs.
Sometimes you just need to do something stupid while sober so that people will leave you alone about your drinking.