Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
United States is where moms get a day and shark get a whole week.
If we can have HD video from Mars,,, then I should have 4 bars on my phone everywhere I go.
Just finished my first book yesterday. 450 pages. Man, that was a lot of coloring...
When your wife`s in labour, never sneak a look at the business end; it`s like watching your favourite pub burn down.
Summer: Hair gets lighter. Skin gets darker. Water gets warmer. Drinks get colder. Music gets louder. Nights get longer. Life gets better.
Home Alone (1990, Comedy) Two burglars attempt to murder an abandoned 8-year-old child
Dear person reading this, just want you to know that someone cares about you. It`s not me, but I`m sure someone does...
I still sing my ABC’s to see which letter comes first.
Typical: you have nothing to wear for a party and suddenly the rabbits, the birds and the mice begin to sew you a dress
Living with a child is like using a blender with no lid...
How about this for lazy: I`m letting the NSA take all my selfies for me.
I’m thinking there’s some type of filter that prevents normal people from like my page
I may be asking too much of this coffee.
24 astronauts were born in Ohio.....What is it about that state that makes people want to flee the Earth?
Whoever named anteaters, solid effort right there.