Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
A new study has found that women with larger butts live longer than men who mention it.
You’re the reason I wake up everyday... Just kidding I have a job!!
Oh I thought it was wait 30 YEARS after eating before you exercise.
One does not simply log out of their friend`s facebook account without making them gay.
One great thing about life before the internet was if you met someone, you didn`t then have to know them the rest of your life.
When the girl working the counter says "would you like fries with that?" say.."are you calling me fat??" then burst into tears. Free meal.
Look in the mirror and tell me that God does not have a sense of humor.
Why doesn`t, "I have a headache!" work for when I don`t want to mow the yard?
Take Note: a stress ball can be used for throwing at people who stress you out.. You`re Welcome..
I bought a book called `How to become an expert at Origami`. So far, I`ve made 1000 paper snowballs.
My dream job would be the Karma delivery service.
The worst form of Alzheimer’s is when you walk out of the kitchen and forget to grab a beer.
I only party on 2 occasions. 1. When it’s my birthday 2. When it’s not…
It is impossible to simultaneously keep up a) hope and b) with the Kardashians.
If you come up to my bedroom door and find a sock on the knob it means I`m having sex ... Probably with the other sock.