Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
True laziness is being excited when plans get canceled.
If I go missing this holiday season and there’s a big search party out looking for me, you can save time by not looking at the gym.
Wanted: Magic hat for a snowman
Sometimes all you need, is 500 million dollars.
I always wonder if the people sitting near me at church every Sunday are unsettled by the fact that I take my communion like a shot of cheap vodka because I`m still in a party mode
I hate it when you follow your dreams and wind up in a dumpster in the back ally of an IHOP.
You can`t Febreze bullshit.
If animals spoke our language we`d be in their debt because they`d have some seriously incriminating dirt on all of us.
People who walk in front of the theatre screen while you`re watching a pirated movie on your computer are so rude.
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
We should remove the warning labels from everything and let the stupidity problem take care of itself.
Okay I`m going to workout. Should I post about it now or after I`m done?
Are you bored? Go to someone`s Facebook wall, Scroll down 4 months and like something.
Sometimes in the morning while drinking my coffee, I think about all the people I will be pissing off.
All I need right now is a hug ... And five hundred thousand dollars in cash.