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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I don`t play sports, the only sport I play is shopping. But there`s a lot of walking involved in that. Running sometimes if there`s a sale.
Remember the good old days when LOL meant "Laugh out loud" and not "I can`t think of a good reply"?
Everything I ever needed to know about structural engineering, I learned from Angry Birds.
Nothing in the world is more expensive than a women who’s free for the weekend
I already want to take a nap tomorrow.
If your drug dealer is always on time he is a cop …
Apparently people will pay to be subjected to medieval torture devices if you call the place a "gym."
Women who say the quickest way to a man`s heart is through his stomach, have not seen his browser history.
I wouldn`t pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands.
A woman saying "I`m not mad at you" is like a dentist saying "You won`t feel a thing."
I wonder if monsters ever get scared that we might be hiding under their bed?
If flying is really so safe, then why is it called the `terminal`?
If there`s a "Mr." in front of your cat`s name you`re going to die alone.
Pizza doesn’t ask questions. Pizza understands.
Why do they call it "Jew-ish"? Are they not Jew enough?