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i joined new gym yesterday. i did 3 sets of selfies on each machine
really vry funny
Teaching your dog to fetch a beer is smart. Fetching it from the neighbours house is genius.
Just moisturized my hands and now I can`t get out of the bathroom. Send help.
Is there another word for synonym?
Fact: 96% of all arguments end with somebody saying “Google that shit!”
My favorite sexual position is pretty much any of them. I`m just glad to be involved.
If I`m guilty of anything, it`s loving too much. And several outstanding speeding tickets. But mostly loving too much.
Please just put it in the fridge.... We`ll throw it away next week.
Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"? Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it.
I know how to wink my eye in like twelve different languages.
The statement `Hey! Calm down!` has a zero to no success rate of getting someone to calm down
My parents never asked me to run away from home, but there were many unexplained one way tickets.
I’ve never met a weekend that I didn’t like.
Who can really hear themselves thinking?