Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
We`ve all been talking about your paranoia.
My dentist told me I need a crown. I was like I KNOW, RIGHT?
Smooth move.........ExLax
I`d rather spend 5 minutes reorganizing the dishwasher, than spend the 10 seconds it takes to wash the dish that doesn`t fit.
If I ever only have 3 months to live, I want my ex wife to be with me. That would be the longest 3 months of my life.
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
Is everything expensive or am I just poor?
You don`t know laziness until you rob a bank & choose to wait for the amount you stole to be announced on news rather than count it yourself
Word for the day is asstard
The NFL has hired their first female referee ... She will be throwing flags for penalties the teams committed 5 years ago.
I`m tough and can take whatever life throws at me ... Especially if its dipped in chocolate first.
Judging by all of the cologne and shower sets I got for Christmas either people know I like to smell good or I am failing at it.
I just finished writing an article on "How To Improve Your Memory"- But I forgot where I kept it!!
If you see a girl or guy post pictures of their cat you know they`re single.
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator. Hahaha Iām so sorry. No Iām not.