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Got kicked out of the hospital. Apparently the “head nurse” is just the one in charge of the other nurses.
Life is full of disappointments, I`ll just add you to the list.
I`m only 2 girls short of a threesome.
I’m old enough to know what’s bad for me and young enough to do it.
If you laid out all of the people in the world who were ever mean to me, I could then drive my car over them.
If by angry birds you mean flipping off a$$holes while driving then yes I`m at the expert level of Angry Birds
Flu (noun) - The only time when having used tissues laying next to your bed is socially acceptable.
The human body can survive three weeks without food, three days without water but only three hours without wifi.
There is always light at the end of the tunnel. It might be a train or a truck so dont let it hit you.
I`ve decided to take some time off Facebook so I can focus on work and, ok, I`m back
Make BIG mistakes in life. Those people are remembered forever. On Youtube.
Working in retail has taught me that the customer is always right. At least while they`re in earshot...
I bet if you look up dictionary in the dictionary it says "don`t be an a$$hole"
just spilled alphabet soup on my keyboard. I`m so confused
There are two types of people in this world, those with common sense and those who have to pee on the electric fence for themselves