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The amount of people who confuse "to" and "too" is amazing two me.
The best things in life are free, but they still screw you on shipping.
I show my age when I`m in a club with all the 20 somethings.. Guess its because the last dance step I mastered was dancing like Gene Gene The Dancing Machine
...you ever ponder why that page was intentionally left blank?
I said "Candyman" 5 times into the bathroom mirror and sure enough some woman came out of the stall and screamed at me for being in there.
Bring a CD into my car that I "have to hear" and I`ll figure out a way to deploy the passenger side airbags
YouTube "This video is not available in your country". where the hell am I from? NARNIA?
Drinking coffee is a fun way to become dependent on paying money to wake up.
I know she`s talking about rain but I don`t like hearing my mom say she got 6 inches
Can`t believe people still say "pot" it`s not the 70s anymore we call it "saucepan" now
We are living in a generation where Vampires are sparkly,Werevolves are gay and Witches wear leather pants.
Good morning friends … Wait … what the hell m I doing up this early?
Onion rings are vegetables. And the Large size counts as two servings.
This morning I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering. 98 of them said, "How did you get in here?"
I got Mood Poisoning. Must have been something I hate.