Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Transformation Tuesday! Throwback Thursday! Flashback Friday! Never underestimate a woman`s ability to find a reason to post a selfie.
When the cashier asks "How`s your day going?" I reply "I`m buying 3 bottles of wine, it`s clearly only getting better."
Why don’t television shows say, “You will be delighted to know that this program contains strong sexual content?”
My method of going "offline" in FB chat is to simply ignore you.
PLEASE - put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and, in case you didn`t know, they can also breathe fire. 93% of people won`t copy and paste this, because they have already been eaten by dragons. 6% of people are sitting in the shower armed with fire extinguishers and the remaining 1% are awesome and will re-post.
Look at the keyboard. It has `U` and `I` together. Look underneath that. It says `JK`.
If Shrek can find love, so can you. What I`m trying to say is, you look like Shrek
I talked to my mom, and she said she probably hadn`t had sex with any of you guys. Damn dirty liars.
The sole purpose of a child`s middle name, is so he can tell when he`s really in trouble.
No pornhub I do not want to share this video with my friends & family on Facebook
If I had a dollar for everytime i thought of you, I would start thinking about you!
What does envelope 1 of 3 on my credit card bill mean?
I`m glad the Eclipse is over so I can go back to staring directly into the sun.
If it wasn`t for claustrophobia, lack of intelligence, and my intense fear of floating poop, I would`ve made a great astronaut.
To all the students who drop out of high school: Remember two things, 1) You tried your best. 2) I don`t like pickles on my BigMac.