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Silence is Golden, except when coming from children… Then you’d better go check to see what’s broken.
More often than not, the excitement of a Facebook friend request dies upon discovering who it is.
My ex girlfriend had a really weird fetish. She used to dress up as herself and then act like a f*cking b!tch all the time.
I imagine a world where whining on Facebook is illegal.
Well aren`t you a f*cking waste of two billion years of evolution.
I`m going to propose with a mood ring so I can easily see a measurement of how excited she really is.
"Sleeping on the couch" should be a relationship status on Facebook.
Michael Schumacher`s former crew just visited him in the hospital. They changed the wheels on his bed and his drip in 4.4 secs.
POLITICS; from `poly` meaning `many and `Tics` meaning blood-sucking creatures. Just sayin`
Sometimes when it rains I go outside with a cocktail umbrella and pretend I`m a Giant.
Having a 14 year old has made me realize why some species eat their young.
Love your neighbor. But don`t get caught.
Some days the problem is I care too much… Today was not one of those days…
There is no vulnerable feeling like when you are about to sneeze ... with a mouthful of rice.
I could actually watch golf on TV if Land Mines were involved.