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I think on December 21 all the power companies should shut off the power for like 10 minutes just to make people flip out.
Black Friday is Americas version of running with the bulls.
Apparently this Walmart cashier only brushes her favorite teeth.
Just in case you are wondering ... I did not go to Jared.
I`m watching a show about surviving in the wild in case I ever decide to log off and go outside.
Weird is just a side effect of being awesome.
My bank is the worst. They`re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can`t even afford to be broke.
Just knowing that I have successfully pissed you off again makes my day.
A lot of times I wonder if people think my girlfriend is only with me for my money.....but I am always reassured by the fact that I don`t have any money..........or a girlfriend....
My ex has had a really hard time moving on. From what I can tell through his blinds, he is currently eating (something we always did)
Iām home alone. Time to start my concert.
I always put in a full eight hours at work. Spread out over the course of the week.
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%...unless you`re donating blood...
I`ll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions.
I bet the Fantastic 4 were just pretending to have a girl in the group. "Uh yeah she`s just invisible right now. She`s totally real though."