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wonders how you can knock sense into someone when you`re beating them senseless?
I do not have commitment issues... I`ve been buying the same brand of vodka for 8 years!
Life is so much funnier if you have a dirty mind
keep scrolling… it gets better lol
Guys if a woman shaves hers legs she wants you to touch them..... You just have to make sure she knows You.
I`m not always rude. Sometimes I`m sleeping.
I can`t remember if I have any repressed memories.
Why am I always right but people still ignore me...?
Waved to my ex today, next time I might use all my fingers
What are the words I`m looking for? Oh yeah...Eat sh!t and die.
MY MISSION IS COMPLETE!!! I have successfully wasted a little bit of your time today :) carry on!
I hate getting my picture taken. Especially in front of a height chart at the police station.
The nice thing about living in the southern states is that "He needed killing" is a valid legal defense here.
I have no idea why they say that counting sheep helps you fall asleep. This farm is freezing and these cows are noisy as hell.
i just opened a fortune cookie and it started with the word unfortuneatly