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Have a day. That`s about as inspirational I get.
life is unfair theres 6 days between monday and sunday but only 1 between sunday and monday
Types of like on facebook: 1.Stalker like. 2.Crush like. 3.I wanna bang you like. 4.Agree like 5.Pity like.
Marriage tip: Don`t
CAMPING TIP: If you get lost in the woods, a compass can help you get lost more North.
Keychains were invented so that you can lose all of your keys at once.
You don’t have to be naked to have a good time, but it helps.
Christmas spirit? I`m proud to say I`ve got plenty of that. I`ve got rum, whiskey, gin, brandy, vodka and tequila.
So I`m giving up drinking. Hard liquor. On Wednesdays. In June. Next year. (Maybe.)
i just peed so hard that I laughed a little bit
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers make any f*cking sense.
If you see me laughing like a crazy person, think nothing of it ..it`s just the voices in my head telling me jokes!
The only hunger games i care about involve plastic hippos.
Ever notice how many friends you have when you pull out a pack of gum?
My mum`s so old fashioned she thinks LOL = Lots of love. She sent me an SMS saying just to let you know you`re Pa`s in hospital LOL.