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My girlfriend said we can`t hang out this weekend because she doesn`t really exist.
Share this if you are weird and don`t care
Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone.
Never wake a sleeping woman. Because then she´ll be awake.
If you don’t like being tailgated then don’t play movies I like.
Your selfie would be way better if you weren`t in it.
Hey NFL, solution to your recent problem, start allowing players to hit each other on the field again
Don`t ask me stupid questions and I won`t hurt your stupid feelings.
There should be an observation deck at Walmart.
People that are organized are just too lazy to look for things.
Mom in poetic mood ....Asked me to express emptiness .... I showed her my wallet ........ n m cheek still burns .... :-p :-p
No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you. I just want the oil change
This relationship is going to be weird if you keep pretending I`m not your boyfriend.
I got a new high score today ... Sadly, it was on my bathroom scale
This ad says: "3 out of 5 smokers die" Apparently the other 2 become immortal.