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Does any one know how to lower the difficulty settings on tinder?
The 21st century. When deleting history is more important than making it.
I yawn all day at work & school. But when it comes to at night, I’m not tired at all.
Dear Alcohol, Will you be my valentine? ?
If noone comes from the future to stop you, how bad of a decision could it really be?
Found a baby snake in my backyard while mowing. Long story short, I don`t have to mow anymore since my yard is on fire.
I`ve got my wise-ass in my smartypants so I`m ready for anything!
Shout out to people wondering what the opposite of in is.
Spiderman`s Spidey sense is just really spot on anxiety.
Swearing releases stress and that`s just one of the f*cking reasons I do it.
I cannot turn water into wine but, I can turn ice cream into breakfast so that’s pretty neat.
I may look calm, but in my head I´ve punched you in the face 3 times already!
Is it weird that I`m 43 years old and have a secret handshake with 3 adults.....and my dog?
Damn girl, are you a Snickers bar because you`re so sweet and satisfying and surprisingly hard and hold on, are those nuts?
When someone hands you a flyer, it’s like they’re saying here you throw this away.