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I`m still mad that video killed the radio star.
I`m trying to save up enough money to one day afford to save up money.
A new study has found that women with larger butts live longer than men who mention it.
The only problem with using the treadmill is that you can`t run from your own farts.
Pro tip: The kids run around a little longer if you forget to hide the eggs
I like to go on drunk facebook post binges, then claim the next day that someone hacked my account.
Why do I get the feeling that a lot of adults nowadays who ask kids "What do you want to be when you grow up?" are just trying to come up with some ideas?
The only thing I`ve learned from my mistakes is that I make a whole bunch of them
Hey, sorry I missed your call. I saw your name on the caller ID and I didn’t want to ruin my day by talking to you.
I’ve been really depressed these past few days. Finally visited a therapist and got diagnosed. Turns out, I’m poor.
The problem with rich people is I`m not one of them.
Why is it when you take a break from Facebook everyone assumes you`re happy and in love ... Maybe I was in jail.
And I was like “No, Coke is NOT ok. I wanted a Pepsi.” And she was all “Sir, 911 should only be dialed for real emergencies.”
Is there any way to really know how many camouflage shirts are in your house?
I may be asking too much of this coffee.