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Just curious, when pirates use text, IM or twitter, do they used emoticons` like .) .P .D or .( or do they try to fool us by using the two eyed ones?
I´m not cheap, but I am on special this week
Here`s an idea...You go away and I`ll stop ignoring you.
Being rich doesn`t equal happiness but i`d rather cry in a ferrari
My internet goes out more than I do.
only fights if pillows are present.
When I say "It’s a long story" It usually means I just don’t want to tell you it.
Business plan : 1. hold sign that says "free hugs" 2. Whisper during the hug, "it`s $50 to let go"
There is no better sunscreen than sitting inside a bar.
F*ck spiders. F*ck them and the way they move their legs, f*ck their ability to multiply by the million and f*ck their eight, beady little black eyes that offer unblinking, soulless glimpses of the blackest depths of hell itself.
“I’m not washing it, I’m just gonna shove it in a pony.” If you’re a girl, that sentence is actually ok.
The only thing my girlfriend blows is everything out of proportion.
The heart wants what the heart wants. *opens 12th beer*
Well, I`ve officially entered the, "Why did I come into this room?" phase of my life.
A fear of mine is a proctologist with poor depth perception!