Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
What´s the difference between light and hard? You can go to bed with a light on.
Most of being an adult is marveling at the date and saying how fast the year is going by.
Summer vacation: Where you drink triple, see double and act single.
I hate to admit it, but I’ve got a serious drinking problem. I don’t have any more money to buy liquor.
My brain is giving me the silent treatment
I have come to the conclusion that dryer lint is the cremated remains of all my missing socks.
Acting like a mature adult is super easy if you hate having fun.
Tip of the day: Don`t piss off anyone who has unlimited access to your toothbrush.
If my week was a YouTube video, Monday would be that crappy ad that doesn`t let you skip.
I`ve seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad.
Nice try horror movies, but everyone in my generation is already terrified to answer their phones
What`s the difference between a Garbanzo Bean and a Chickpea? I never had a Garbanzo Bean on my face.
Hitting the lotto is a sure way to stop hating on Mondays...
You call it camping. I call it getting drunk with insects.
No, I CAN’T believe how early it’s getting dark. After 4 billion years of this happening I was sure this would be the year it didn’t.