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I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
Love putting on underwear fresh out of the dryer. They`er so warm and cozy, and it`s fun to scan the laundromat and guess whose they are.
You hate me? I didn’t even know you existed.
I found out why I`m still single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you.
Well that’s a wrap on another day where I act like I know what I’m doing
I feel sorry for people who don`t have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.
Don`t trust anyone that orders a Medium Pizza....
Yet another advantage of being single. All I bring to Thanksgiving is empty Tupperware...
What do bats eat that makes their sh!t our standard for crazy?
Do you have to water a Pointsettia or do they die on their own?
My blood hound was just attacked by a Crip hound.
Facebook is perfect for those people that have never been very good at waiting for their turn to speak.
Plastic surgeons are the only people that actually encourage you to pick your nose.
My desire to be well informed is currently in deep conflict with my need to stay sane.
Someone asked me if I`m ever scared that I`ll be alone forever, which I thought was so rude because my cat was right there.